Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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