I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize