Well apparently he's into motor boating.
we're chasing vodka with high fives
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
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