you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Randomize
