i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
