Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
how do you play pong handcuffed?
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
