we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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