But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Just pee around me
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize