I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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