So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
