I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
