no you cant smoke seaweed
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
