I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
