Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Randomize
