she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
People with herpes should wear stickers.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
