Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize
