I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
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