Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize