yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
