I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
