I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
