I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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