I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
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