I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize