yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize