Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
