highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize