that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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