I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
