Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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