If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
two words...techno handjob
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Randomize
