So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
