No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
