I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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