how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Go christen that room with your naked body.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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