She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
whose ass print is on the piano?
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
