So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize
