Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize