She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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