got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
