chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize