im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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