can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
He passed out mid-signature
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
