this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
