Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
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