its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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