Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Operation Purity has been aborted
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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