how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
