I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize
