hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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