I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
