who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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